Sick and tired

The nausea is lasting much longer this time. The first cycle it was over the first night! This time it's Friday and I still feel sick to my stomach.

I'm tired too, I slept most of this week and I'll nap alot today I'm sure.

I miss my kids too, I hope they don't remember how tired and absent Mommy's been these past 2 months.

I just want it to be done but I don't feel like it's lifting yet.

Chemo #4

Today's the last chemo. We decided to not do the last Neulasta shot, there's not much point in being ready for the next cycle when this is the last cycle. Also a nurse says it might be the cause of my arm pain.

The chemo is uneventful except that they poke me several times finding a vein. Nurse #2 has to come over and try and she misses once too. I have an angry bruise spot and a long bruise streak to show for it.

Amazingly I still have some hair, it's only enough to wear a baseball hat and not look too goofy but I'll take it. Cycle #4 will probably finish it off though.

I'm dreading this coming week but at least it's almost over.

#4 Tomorrow...

Chemo #4 is tomorrow and my arm is still hurting. I have no idea where they will be doing the treatment but it won't be this arm. I can see where one vein has collapsed and my muscle (nerve?) still hurts further up.

I'm definitely more tired this cycle, maybe it was a little virus or having my period or maybe the chemos accumulate. I guess I'll know next week after #4.

Thank God this is almost over and my sympathies to people who have 8, 12 or more cycles.

My Arm Is Killing Me

My arm is weak and in pain from all the injections, infusions and blood draws in the last few months. They don't like to use the other arm since I had the mastectomy there so everything is coming and going with my left arm. Chemo #2 bruised me and #3 must have hit a nerve or something because it really hurts there.

On the up side I got my tissue expander re-inflated today so my right half finally matches my left. 2 more inflations and we'll be ready for the implant to finish the reconstruction. I can't wait.

Bad News/Good News

The only thing worse than a chemo treatment week is a chemo week AND your period. I heard all kinds of things about what chemo would do to my ovaries but no one can say for sure. There's a good chance (maybe 30%?) that the chemo will induce early menopause and "kill" them. I guess this is a good sign, it's right on time and fairly normal. Even if it isn't a good sign, there's no way it can be a bad one right?

I'm certain it doesn't make the week easier though.

Last cycle is June 18th.

My Uncle Died

I can't imagine a worse time but my uncle has died, of cancer no less. I really wanted to be there for my aunt right now but I just don't feel up to a 6 hour drive. Flying is $1000 (and this is a lousy time for unexpected expenses) but I'm worried that I'll get sick in a plane (or hotel, or rental car, etc.)

Chemo Cycle #3

Well Chemo plus a cold is no fun. I can hardly breathe but my white cell counts were still good enough for round three. On the one hand I hate this cold and that I might have it for another week, on the other hand I'm happy to be 3/4 done.

The hair is about 2/3 gone now and I have to wear a hat to go out. No one at Mayo could believe it had lasted this long. I still wonder if a "cold cap" would have worked for me.

A Cold

I have a cold or at least a stuffed up nose. I'm even more tired than usual too. Maybe it's a virus or maybe it's just the edema they mentioned and some hay fever. Either way I'm not looking forward to another cycle tomorrow.